Next on Springer: "My man is a male prostitute!"

Jessica: Jerry, I've been lied to. He told me he was just a musician. He was always away for "gigs." He went on "tour." I trusted him Jerry. If he was having so much trouble finding money for school, he should have told me.

Jerry: So now you know he's been working as "an escort--" what do you want to say to him, Jessica?

Jessica: I'll tell him that he's a @&*%^ #&**%^ of *&%$##$! Bring that *&$^#@ piece of *@!# out so I can look him the eyes!

Jerry: Ladies and gentlemen, Raul thinks he's here because Jessica nominated him for "hottest man of the year." (boos from the crowd) Alright, Raul, come on out!

So, I checked out Raul's blog this morning. A lot of times when I have to read text, I go to this free translation website to get quick help for tough words. I know it's cheating, and believe me, if I depended on that website, I would pay a steep price for it. But today, the results were hilarious. So I thought my non-Spanish speaking readers might enjoy a little glimpse into Raul's life, thanks to the EVER-SO-ACCURATE website. See if you can understand what actually happened:

August 12th
Damned Nurse

I had to become a male prostitute TAC and the unhappy nurse hurt my right hand with the intravenous prostitute. So PROSTITUTE TAKES ME. I hope that it should lower soon the pain and the distension because I occupy to study violin. Unhappy tongue.....